update: I don’t think I want to come back from maternity leave

Ask A Manager

Remember the letter-writer who wasn’t sure if she wanted to come back from maternity leave (#3 at the link; first update here )? it was very taxing for me, especially because of an office culture where the relationship between management and staff could be quite adversarial at times. I am especially grateful for all of AAM’s advice for applying and interviewing for jobs.

my department will fall apart if I get pregnant and take maternity leave

Ask A Manager

I have every intention of accepting the job and know life will go on if I do get pregnant and need to take leave. I have some issues though: If I get promoted, and get pregnant right away, I would be out on leave during the busiest time of the year, putting undue hardship on my company. If I get promoted and pregnant, I feel like I wouldn’t be able to take any leave, as our department is busy non-stop, all day long. What if you quit?

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maternity leave and hurt feelings, penalizing employees who won’t participate in wellness programs, and more

Ask A Manager

I was hurt when the person I’m covering for maternity leave attended our Christmas lunch. I’m filling a maternity leave role with the agreement in place that I will be hired full-time. Over the holiday season, our unit had a Christmas lunch and when we showed up at the venue, the person I’m replacing (who is still on her maternity leave) was there waiting to join us for lunch. It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go….

I’m being assigned “make up” work before maternity leave, coworker is pushing prescription pills, and more

Ask A Manager

I’m being assigned “make up” work before my maternity leave. Knowing that I’m going on maternity leave in three months, he asked me to cover their shifts, on top of my own, in the two months preceding my leave. I know that my being on leave will be a burden to the rest of the librarians, so I’m afraid to look like I’m not being a team player. This is my first job after university so I’m not quite sure what would be okay.

my boss hasn’t returned from maternity leave, watching what I say around a coworker with financial worries, and more

Ask A Manager

My boss hasn’t returned from maternity leave. When I was brought on, I knew that my new manager would be leaving for maternity leave about four months in to my new position. But I figured when she got back from leave we would pick up where we left off. Her maternity leave has been over for almost three weeks now and she still isn’t back to work full-time. Is it normal for people to take extra weeks on top of 12 weeks of maternity leave?

giving a negative reference for a nightmare employee, I don’t want to come back after maternity leave, and more

Ask A Manager

During his short tenure, nearly all the staff quit, there was a hostile work environment investigation, and relationships with partners ranging from foundations to long-term consultants were ruined. You definitely can’t give a reference that leaves out the worst parts. I recently went through a second interview — a panel interview — for a job I’m really interested in, and am waiting to hear back. I don’t think I want to come back from maternity leave.

manager is on maternity leave and I’m overwhelmed, a company told me they’d call the police if I contact them again, and more

Ask A Manager

My manager is on maternity leave and I’m overwhelmed. My boss just went on maternity leave and I took over her duties in addition to my own. Before my boss left, she suggested to tell people that we are down one person and that our priorities are outline in her maternity leave plan, but that isn’t working so far because people are ignoring that plan and keep coming up to me with their priorities. Did I answer this interview question badly?

how to quit your job

Ask A Manager

Should you be honest in your exit interview? You may also like: do you have to tell your boss why you’re quitting? questions about resigning — while your boss is on maternity leave, when your boss is hard to find, and when your… update: what’s the best way to resign when your boss will explode? how to quit your job was originally published by Alison Green on Ask a Manager.

my boss won’t let me quit, treating people like adults while enforcing high standards, and more

Ask A Manager

Yesterday was my last day — but my boss won’t let me quit. That and a few other things are what made me quit. However, after it was time to leave I was “forced” to make edits to projects and that resulted in six hours worth of overtime. The people writing it have done quite a few, and are both writing professionals that do this together in their free time (and I have known them personally for quite some time). It’s five answers to five questions.

2017 61

interviewers didn’t leave me any time to ask my own questions, my boss wants to sue me for quitting, and more

Ask A Manager

My interviewers didn’t leave me any time to ask my own questions. I just had an interview that I think went pretty well, but no one left any time for questions! None of the interviewers left any time for questions (and did not suggest that it was only because we were running late, for example). At this point, wait until there’s another interview or they make you an offer. My boss is threatening to sue me for quitting. It’s five answers to five questions.

2017 45

Workplace Gossip is a Career Killer

Professional Resume Services

Some people never really leave high school. It’s one thing to spend a few minutes chatting about the latest ball scores or last night’s, “Castle” episode, or to discuss the co-worker who has just returned from maternity leave, in a positive manner.

my coworker gets angry when we chew, peer interviews, and more

Ask A Manager

Do I have to say where I’m going next when I quit? Recently, a few of my colleagues resigned, and she gave all of them unsolicited advice and opinion on their decisions to leave. After each of them had left, Bianca started asking everyone why so-and-so would even consider leaving when the benefits are so good. (To If she asks, you can say anything from “they’ve asked me not to announce it yet” to “I’m not quite ready to share it yet” to “I haven’t solidified my plans.”.

2019 51

coworker uses icebreakers in every meeting, is it wrong to fake enthusiasm in a job interview, and more

Ask A Manager

Is it wrong to fake enthusiasm during an interview? I’m considering leaving my current job and have been sending out job applications to get a feel for what is out there. I just had an interview and I think I did well and may get an offer. I came to to this realization before the interview, but went ahead with the interview just in case it changed my mind (it didn’t). ” I was generally quite warm and enthusiastic through the whole interview.

2018 55

claiming reimbursements for fake expenses, rude interviewers, and more

Ask A Manager

This means that there is quite a bit of carpooling, because the cast is responsible for getting to shows that don’t require overnight stays (for overnight stays there is bus transportation). Telling a recruiter about a rude interviewer. I’ve been in the late stages of interviewing for two roles at a large international company that I’ll call MegaTech. Today I had my final three interviews of six. All went fine until the last interview.

2015 59

employee goes into emotional spirals, interviewers who ask if you’re applying to other companies, and more

Ask A Manager

I could tell she was sensitive during the interview, which was fine, but didn’t find out until she started working that she has awful, awful anxiety. I want her to do well and don’t want to let her go, but I need to find a way to do it in a way that doesn’t leave me this emotionally exhausted. I just returned from maternity leave, and he has made a few comments related to breastfeeding that make me uncomfortable. It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go….

2019 60

how can I cheat my temp agency, how do I know if I did well in an interview, and more

Ask A Manager

After a while, the agency flat out refused to lower the rates they were charging in addition to mine, so now I’m pretending to quit so my boss can pay me directly and bring me on permanently. How do I know if I did well in an interview? How would one know if he/she does well in an interview? Do you feel like you had a reasonably good rapport with the interviewer, and they seemed engaged in the conversation with you? It’s five answers to five questions.

letting a former thief make amends, the ego blow of not being interviewed, and more

Ask A Manager

I recently returned to the office from maternity leave and am pumping several times a day. I know I am already lucky – I have a supportive employer and a private office (with lock installed upon my return from leave specifically to accommodate pumping!) – but am still running into issues of pumping etiquette. Dealing with the ego blow of not being interviewed after doing great work for an organization. It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go….

2018 47

my partner on a group project is holding everything up, chilly behavior at the end of an interview, and more

Ask A Manager

I have a good relationship with my employer and didn’t want to let them down by leaving them in the lurch last minute. The payments with voluntary redundancies are to incentivize people to leave when they otherwise wouldn’t (generally to try to reduce the greater pain of involuntary lay-offs later). You’re already leaving for your own reasons, so it wouldn’t make any sense for the company to incentivize you by paying you to go. I had a weird interview experience today.

2017 46

employee opened everyone’s paychecks to see what they make, asking why it took so long to be interviewed, and more

Ask A Manager

The employee who told was upset about it and didn’t quite know how to “break the news” at first. Can I ask why it took so long to be contacted for an interview? I applied for a job in February and was just contacted for an interview. During the interview, it it appropriate to ask why it took so long (in a polite way, of course)? Yesterday morning, I had an interview with a recruiter regarding a position I am very interested in.

2014 60

Dear Job Seeker, I’ve Been There


John has been out of work over a year and hasn’t had a lot of luck getting interviews. I was having a baby and taking a full maternity leave. We quit eating out. I quit my corporate job and began working for myself full-time.

2011 149

giving a job interviewer a free sample from my Etsy shop, who owns what I created at work, and more

Ask A Manager

Giving a job interviewer a free sample from my Etsy shop. I went on an interview last Thursday that went well. My interviewer said, “Oh, that’s great!” ” After the interview, she asked if I would like to stay and sit with another employee to see how a typical case is built, etc. I said yes and as we were walking to the front desk, she was quite interested in what kind of jewelry I made and what a cha cha bracelet was!

2016 41

Job Hoppers: Advice Before & After You Hop

Careers Done Write

If you are thinking of quitting before you have a new job, consider that decision very carefully. If your break in employment is due to maternity leave, raising children, or caring for a seriously ill family member, it is alright to mention that reason for leaving under your most recent position. There are many old adages associated with career success. One that remains true is, “Better to have a job to get a job.”

2012 152

my boss is showing off his new $900,000 house, my weakness is my temper, and more

Ask A Manager

It has been quite the adjustment, to say the least. Should I tell interviewers my weakness is my temper? I know a pretty typical interview question is to describe your weaknesses. How do I say this in an interview in a way that isn’t totally a turn-off?

2020 71

boss wants us to use personal social media for marketing, we can only take one week of vacation at a time, and more

Ask A Manager

It’s okay for an employer to say, “If you think someone in your personal network could use our services, here’s info you can use to pitch us” — and then leave it up to you. We obviously can’t entirely prevent someone from attending on their own, but it just doesn’t feel quite right to me. I voiced my concerns gently once and it didn’t go anywhere, should I leave it alone? Don’t lie and say you need FMLA leave if you don’t. It’s five answers to five questions.

2020 54

my new employee applied for another job and I’m on the search committee, and 4 other questions

Ask A Manager

Also, the hiring authority has now asked me to serve on the search committee for the position, so my employee will eventually realize that I know she applied for the position when she sees me attending the interviews. Interviews that will happen in our office’s conference room, and as the receptionist she’ll be expected to greet the interviewees when they arrive, for a position she applied for! I was responsible for finding my own maternity leave coverage.

2017 47

updates: the coworker who lashes out, the dunce caps, and more

Ask A Manager

My boss offered me paid sick leave to deal with all the accumulated work stress. How do I escape an exit interview with my terrible boss? (#2 I just hope that HR and any future boss will see through this as in some points he is contradicting his own past evaluation from 5 months ago and actually just promoted me right before I quit. I am now (quite happily) divorced and happier than I every have been, or every thought I could be.

2020 51

7 Things Dads Should Ask About Before Taking The Job

Career Realism

Based on my research interviewing fathers about how they balance work and family , here are some important benefits that will help you achieve some kind of balance: 1. Paid Paternity Leave. Health insurance benefits vary quite a bit among employers.

2013 114

updates: the mandatory feelings chart, the anonymous sexism report, and more

Ask A Manager

I wish I could say I gathered up my courage to rage quit on the spot and run out of his office yelling about girl power… But student loans and the job prospects in my state being what they were, a more strategic approach was required. We ended up widening our search, and found a candidate with industry experience, a good resume, and interviewed well. He then abruptly quit three weeks ago with no notice period. My last day before maternity leave is this Friday!

2019 51

should our office stop cake collections, disclosing a wage garnishment, and more

Ask A Manager

Should our office stop collecting money for cards and cakes when people leave? In my office, there is a custom that when a colleague leaves, folks in the office contribute a few dollars towards a card, a farewell cake, or similar. If the company wants to give cards or cakes to people who are leaving (which is a nice thing to do), the company should pay for it. Am I obligated to stay in my job while covering for a colleague on maternity leave?

2015 40

can you work from home while caring for small kids, presenting with a coworker who swears, and more

Ask A Manager

She has told me he has told her he thinks she should be able to continue to work from home managing a toddler and a preschooler (after maternity leave). I occasionally work with a junior colleague who curses quite a lot. We do not hire people often since we have almost zero turn over, but when we do, it is up to me to post job listings and perform the interviews. Interviews were scheduled until we finally selected the person who would fit very well in the role.

2019 63

short answer Sunday — 6 short answers to 6 short questions

Ask A Manager

Negotiating maternity leave and salary at the same time. I am excited about a recent interview. I am 7 months pregnant and will need to negotiate a maternity leave. I understand taking leave shortly after starting is not ideal and I hope to negotiate a short leave 3-4 weeks, then reduced hours for an additional 2-3 weeks. My main question is… can I negotiate a higher salary AND a maternity leave?

2013 57

when customers speak to each other in a foreign language that I understand, my boss asked me to vent to her, and more

Ask A Manager

Particularly, since you were only teaching there for a year and it wasn’t your full-time job, the easiest solution here is to leave it off. Interviewing for a manager position where the direct reports are being hired before the manager. I interviewed last week for an assistant director position at a state agency. At the end of the interview, I asked some questions, one of which was if there were vacant positions reporting to this position.

2016 57

updates: the friend-boss and more

Ask A Manager

I don’t have anything huge yet, but since there ended up being quite a lot of criticism about jumping the gun (and my relationship in general) in the comments, I figured I’d offer an update. When I wrote in, I was finishing up covering a co-worker’s maternity leave. Also, as of January 1st my company is expanding a lot of their benefits too, including maternity leave, which is awesome.

2017 46

hiring a candidate with controversial political views, my boss doesn?t like it when women curse, and more

Ask A Manager

We recently interviewed a candidate who previously held a position at an organization involved a hot-button issue. The candidate was purely professional during their interview and didn’t bring up their stance on the issue. And I expect that any professional will leave their strongly held political beliefs at home. The few times I’ve cursed — and it’s been quite mild! — Responding to questions about an employee who’s on maternity leave.

2018 55

intern laughs inappropriately, risqué bookmarks on my computer, and more

Ask A Manager

I noticed it during her interview, but I chalked it up to nerves and hoped it would subside as she became more comfortable. It came across quite strangely. Should I ask future job interviewers what their response was to coronavirus? A meme has been circulating on social media where a potential employee asks their interviewer what their response was to COVID-19 and what steps they took to provide for the health and safety of their employees.

2020 61

my new coworker is my childhood bully, getting people stop with replying-all, and more

Ask A Manager

For what it’s worth, I’ve read quite a few accounts of former childhood bullies and people who confronted their former bullies, and apparently it’s not uncommon for the bullies not to even remember that they were horrible to a particular person! I cancelled an interview and was asked to reimburse the cost of a plane ticket. I had been scheduled to fly in on a Friday for an interview with Company A. However, the day before the interview, I accepted a position with Company B.

2016 61

new hire wants to print everything, how can I make myself look less qualified, and more

Ask A Manager

Do I leave my master’s degree off my resume? I don’t want to leave the job off, because eight years is a big gap; I left there about four years ago, though, so well within the time period normally covered by a resume. You could leave your master’s off, but I don’t think you need to. Interviewing post-pregnancy when I still look pregnant. I had a phone interview with a company I’m interested in and it seemed to go well.

2018 49

???? 61 Hidden Job Market Secrets Without Using Social Media


18) Local craigslist discussion forums – look for profession-related questions that employees would typically manage for an employer, respond and leave a job seeker’s signature. Are any ex-employees very recent i.e. they quit or were fired?

I was rejected for a job I was qualified for, a coworker in a beach cover-up, and more

Ask A Manager

I was rejected for a job I should have been interviewed for. I recently applied for a job that I knew I should at least get an interview for at a community college. ” Since it sounds like you assumed you’d at least be interviewed: Keep in mind that meeting the minimum qualifications for a job isn’t enough to guarantee that. This is an issue for quite a few people in our office. If you’re not her manager, I’d leave it alone.

2018 57

List of things I hate #3 | Penelope Trunk's Brazen Careerist

Penelope Trunk

Maternity leave It’s not that I don’t like the topic. Take paid maternity leave no matter what. So even if you quit when maternity leave is over, take paid leave. The US makes women earn maternity leave. Snoop on other people's careers to gain self-knowledge Blame yourself first: Answers to letters from readers, sort of How to decide how much to reveal about yourself Comments (184) Leave a Comment I so agree with #1.

2010 67

talking about my pregnancy at work when I’m placing the baby for adoption

Ask A Manager

Women in my family do not tend to “show” for quite a while as we are large-framed and carry pretty far back, but I know it’s only a matter of time before it becomes something I either get asked about or will need to address. Additionally, I know I will need to discuss FMLA/maternity leave with my manager. At some point you will indeed need to talk to your manager about your leave. She doesn’t need an accounting of your plans for the leave beyond that.

2019 67

updates: I’m hearing secondhand reports of problems with an employee, coworker forces loud political rants on me, and more

Ask A Manager

She told me that they’d be flexible with my schedule after maternity leave because “I won’t know how I’ll feel until I’ve had the baby.” She said that she trusted that if anyone could strategize and plan my maternity leave as well as the capital campaign, it was me! I absolutely will come up with a concrete plan for my maternity leave and easing back into work full-time that I will go over with them in the new year.

2016 40

manager ordered me to get along with a coworker, handling work when a family member is on trial, and more

Ask A Manager

My manager told me to get along with a coworker or quit. He put me on something else for the rest of the day, but as I was leaving informed me i could “deal with it or quit.” However, there is quite a misconception of narcolepsy due to how little knowledge people have of it, other than how it has been portrayed by the entertainment industry. My friends have given me the advice to either briefly hint at it in my résumé or wait to mention in an interview.

2013 56